


Better Together

by ByTheAngell (SomeLittleInfamy)



Series: Tumblr Prompts [5]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Coping, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, hints of jimon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 10:33:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14809701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeLittleInfamy/pseuds/ByTheAngell
Summary: While everyone copes with the loss of Clary, Simon and Jace embrace the fact that they understand the other's pain the most, gravitating to one another in the weeks that follow as they try to find a way toward a new normal.





	Better Together

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr prompt: "You’ll be the death of me.”

“No, you’re doing it all wrong-” Simon says, words choppy after a huff of breath in his frustration. “You can’t just hit _all of the buttons at once_. You need to use the combos, like this.” He holds his controller up and attempts to show Jace how to use his special attack, but Jace isn’t listening to a word he says.

“You keep saying that,” Jace points out. “But I won two out of the last three rounds.” He’s not about to stop a strategy that continues to win victories over the vampire. Winning is the only thing keeping him playing the game rather than throwing his controller through the screen of the television, which is what he almost did before adapting to his newest technique of smashing all of the buttons in rapid succession and hoping something good happens.

They both sit on the sofa in the living room of Simon’s apartment, pretending that they’re here because they want to be. That this - the two of them hanging out and throwing themselves into any and every distraction - is normal for them.  That this is fine, the way the two of them gravitate towards one another in their grief, neither one of them comfortable enough to talk to the other about it but still taking some small comfort in the other’s presence. Clary’s loss hit everyone hard, but none of the others loved her quite the way they had. And while Simon’s love for her was different from Jace’s, it matched in its intensity, and the pain they felt hit just as hard.

VICTORY!

The word crosses the screen as Simon’s character falls dramatically to the ground in slow-motion defeat. “Give up yet?” Jace asks, a slight smirk on his face as he takes a sip of the beer on the table. There are a dozen more in the fridge, ones that Simon started keeping here after Jace began to make a habit of these weekly (and occasionally bi-weekly) visits. The first time Simon asked if he wanted to stay after coming to fill him in on things post-Lilith-explosion, he didn’t expect Jace to agree. After that it became routine, an occasional visit just to make sure the other is doing alright. Their friends worry about them, the way they close themselves off sometimes, growing distant and refusing to talk about it... about her. At least, refusing to talk about it with anyone else. Sometimes they talk about what happened to each other, though; other times they talk about Clary in general, the things they loved about her, the things they missed the most. But more often than not they just lose track of time for a little while, which helps too, in its own way. Neither of them is doing particularly ‘well’, but they are both still here. They’re both still trying to find some new sense of normal, and it is enough for now. It has to be.

“You wish. You can’t fake your way through this forever you know.” Simon hits the restart option and they start again, Simon picking his tried-and-true favorite for the 4th time in a row while Jace arbitrarily picks at random, knowing it doesn’t matter at this point. They go on like this for hours, the time slips away with the daylight that fades from the windows and is replaced by lamps and ceiling lights.  It isn’t until there’s a series of knocks on the door too fast and loud to be considered calm that they tear their attention back to the world around them, broken from the easy detachment of the fighting games.

“Jace?! Simon?” It’s Alec’s voice that reaches them through the door. What is _Alec_ doing here? Simon stands first and makes his way over to the door in an instant.

“Alec? What’s up?” Because that is definitely the face of someone who is approximately two seconds away from some sort of heart attack, or aneurysm, or both. But the relief that washes over him the moment he lays eyes on them answers his question with a sinking realization in the pit of Simon's stomach.

“Neither of you were, uh,  answering your phones,” Alec says, forcing his face back into the most neutral expression he can manage. “For _hours_.” He adds, justifying his panic the best he could. He won’t come out and say that he was afraid this was it, this was the time that one, or both, of them did something they’d regret. “I just wanted to… y’know, check in and make sure nothing was wrong.”

Jace feels as guilty as Alec looks. It’s easy to forget while he and Simon take comfort in not being alright together that it isn’t something so easily understood outside these beige walls. That no one else is quite sure what to make of them most of the time, handling every conversation like a ticking time bomb.

Simon looks around but doesn’t even see his phone anywhere. Maybe it's in his room… or maybe he lost it? He barely uses it these days, it could be anywhere, really. Jace pulls his phone out of his pocket but the black screen doesn’t come to life when he touches it.

“Guess it died while I was out. Sorry, Alec.” He never means to worry him, but he knows that Alec can feel the hopeless despair that takes over him more often than he cares to admit. Alec doesn’t want to treat him like some fragile, broken thing, but it’s difficult when that’s exactly how he feels.   

Alec’s phone, which is very much alive, rings, and he answers it, switching it over to speaker phone. “Jace Herondale, one of these days you’ll be the death of me.” The voice belongs to Izzy.

“You sound like Mom,” he says, and that both he and Alec laugh, easing some of the tension built up from before.

“Just get back here before you miss your meeting with Underhill about the new overnight security procedures.” Jace can practically hear the dramatic eye roll through the phone.

“...now you _really_ sound like Mom.” There’s a huff before the phone hangs up with an abrupt click and the three of them exchange a look in the silence that follows before laughing some more. And maybe this is it. Maybe this _is_ the new normal for them. Maybe their new normal is just concern and care and figuring it out one moment at a time, and embracing the easy moments when they came, appreciating them all the more for the respite they bring.

Jace and Simon share one last knowing look, the small smiles in the face of life rather than in avoidance of it something they’re both aware of as something new, but good-new. A clear step in the right direction.

On their way out Alec hangs back a few steps to pull Simon aside. “I just wanted to say thanks, for... “ he starts, his voice a rushed whisper. He’s trying to thank Simon for being there for Jace, but he can’t seem to find the right  words to convey just how much it means to him that Jace has someone he feels comfortable turning to, even if that someone isn’t him right then. “Whenever I try to talk to him he shuts down and deflects, and it just makes everything worse... But he always seems a lot better after he spends time here with you. So thanks, for being there for him.”

Simon nods, but doesn’t have time to respond before Alec slips out the door to catch up with his parabatai.

**Author's Note:**

> I tagged this with Jace/Simon and Jace & Simon because honestly I didn't know what I was going to write going into this prompt, and I still can't decide if I'm feeling shippy vibes or just really great friends vibes. So. WHY NOT BOTH since I'm sure people will read into it both ways as they want to! 
> 
> (Find me on [Tumblr](http://bytheangell.tumblr.com))


End file.
